I thought I was finally free of the woman but she is back to bugging me. I hate that I am really wanting to take the high road and not be a B*&^h to this woman but she is making it rather difficult!
She keeps giving me orders like, unfriend his family or else!
Or else what? I have known his family for 10 years, so NO!
I got offered a teaching job at her kids school which I declined to be nice and she was like, Good cause I would have had you transferred.
I'm seriously torn between wanting to be rid of her and wanting to tell her to shove it because she isnt telling me to do sh*t! Everything I am doing is out of the kindness of my heart to her family, NOT to appease her! 

i would start keeping records 

I wouldn't go out of my way to be nice! No way I would have turned down the job bc her kids went there!! lol, Sounds like she's just making an @$$ out of herself. I would keep records, though like OnA said. Do you think she'll actually try something, or just keep bugging you like this? I hope she doesn't take it any further, but man, that does suck to have to put up with it!

I never understood people who get mad at the other woman when they didn't know the dude was married... I always thought they should be mad at their husband, since he's the one who actually cheated. 

How is she contacting you? If by text, block her number. I would go and report it. It would put a stop to it. 

^^True! I was being harassed by text once, and all I had to do was go down to the police and fill out a report and forward the threatening texts to the cop's email. The cop called the dude, and told him that I didn't want him to contact me anymore. Said if he did after that, we'd press charges. Never heard from him again :) And by doing that, there would be an official record of it, besides just saving texts. 

i didn't know that cops would take the time to help out that much with harassment! that is good to know 

Yep ...I've never known them to take harrassment lightly...as long as its a legitimate harrassment case. 

i guess it depends on the cop you get.

in san diego our car window was shot out and the cops did nothing. here in wa some stuff was stolen out of our unlocked car, and the cops did a thorough investigation that lasted over a week. 

A guy I dated once was pretty awful with that... I went to his command and they gave him a no contact order. So he went off post and told the local cops I was harassing HIM. they literally laughed when they called me and I told them what was going on. 

If you genuinely want this to be over and done with it's time to take action. If you told her to stop, and she hasn't, it's legit harassment from what you have described. Change your number and get a restraining order. 

I was talking about harrassment ona. Its like that in a lot of places especially big cities. Crimes get pushed to the side if you didn't know who it was because they usually have bigger things to deal with. I used to live in El cajon. 

If you really aren't in the wrong here, why do you feel guilty? I wouldn't feel guilty in the least dating someone I thought was single and turned out he wasn't. Not my problem unless I kept seeing him after I knew he was. So why the guilt?

How does she know you turned down a teaching job unless you have been telling her? 

I did tell her. She says ten times a day to stay out of her life and so I said back, I am staying out to her that I am not only staying away but I have gone out of my way to make sure Im not near her by turning down the job.
The reason I feel guilty though is because my marriage was ruined by this exact same thing and so it kills me that I have now done this to someone else. 

it can be hard to not feel guilty, but honestly if it weren't you it would be someone else. it was just happenstance. 

Have you reported her at all? 

The reason I feel guilty though is because my marriage was ruined by this exact same thing and so it kills me that I have now done this to someone else.

But - you didn't mess up their marriage, he did!! Don't feel guilty! 

The only way it would be your fault is if after knowing he was married you continued to try the relationship. Don't worry about it. Stop feeding into her by replying. If you really want it to stop you will report it. Or if she is texting I would block the number. How did she even get your contact information?