I am new to Ft Lewis and have two kids and having a very hard time adjusting. We are here and do not know anyone. I am so shy and don't know how to make new friends (sadly, I am almost 4O). I feel like I am going insane. I have always worked and being at home all day is so hard, besides just having the one income. Our last duty station, I had my family and a job. Now, I am 3000 miles away and I just want to go home. Help! How do I make this easy for myself and my family! 

My advice is to take it one day at a time. When I first came here, it was the same for me. I had always worked then I came here to being a stay at home mother. I felt very isolated. You could take your kids to Raindrops and Rainbows on North Fort. It is for play time and the parents stay with them and you meet new people. You could also take the FCC classes and become a child care provider for a little extra income and then you would have adult conversation every day with the parents. I have been here almost 3 years and somehow adjusted, but I am now going back home to be with family through deployment. I totally understand how you feel, but try to find it somewhere inside of you to get out of the house at least. Take the kids to the splash park. Look up the MWR website and there is info on there for recreational things to do. I hope this helps some. Good luck!! 

Where are you from? How old are your kids? Maybe we can get together during the week sometime? Do you like coffee? My name is Pam by the way :) 

Where are you from? We are almost exactly 3000 miles from home too! We're from Texas. How long have you guys been here? 

I went thru this for a year. Sorry to hear others suffer this as well...first I had to burst out of my shyness and get over the feeling I was imposing on others, I learned they r like me and hanging out isn't an imposition, just txt and hang out! Next I had to get out of my house! Do anything, even if I did it alone, I learned to make friends where ever(again, ditch being shy) I too gave up a job, we all live miles from home, and most of us have kids, places to find new buddies: mwr events, here on the underground, your neighbors, FRG events, thru soldiers bn/co/crt, Im 40, I've found a few buddies close to our age! Have faith in yourself and good luck chickie! Feel fre to email me! 

I think everyone goes through what your going through. Everyone adjust differently and at different speeds. Your getting a good start by just talking to people on here. Maybe take your kids to the park and talk to other parents. If nothing else we're here for you. 

You kind of just have to put yourself out there..strike up a conversation with someone... send out an invite to meet for coffee and see who bites.. I have to say I'm overly cautious about who I befriend here.. I have met some great ladies and some head cases... I have no patience for gossips, people who only want someone to whine to about their husband and how he treats them so bad but she won't do anything about it.... people with bad @ss kids... sorry.. don't have time for ya... I know that sounds so mean.. but friendships shouldn't be exhausting 

I had that issue. I started going to random home parties. Scentsy parties and stuff. I met a few awesome people through that. 

Sorry. I feel the same way! I recently got together with a few ladies off here and met some really nice gals! :/ I feel exactly the same though about having the kids at home, not working anymore. I tried a few times to hang out last year with a few ladies, but it ended up being a gossip fest and I kindly excused myself. ;/ . 

Hi welcome to the pack, I know how you feel being away from family is hard, you start to get use to it being away from family and the military becomes your family. If you ever want to get together I have small kids too, my daughter is 5 and I have a son who is almost 2. 

Who needs friends when you got Lewisunderground !


These chicks keep me busy and full of laughter when im just sitting at home with nothing to do !

Keep your head up ! im sure its not easy , but it will get better !

good stop on here first these ladies are great on here. 

Welcome! It is hard to be away from family! I'm almost 40 also and know it can be hard to make friends when so many military wives seem to be so young. I have 4 children 18yr boy, 12yr girl, 6yr boyand 3 yr girl. If you ever want to do a play date or have tea or coffee just me a PM. I have a few ladiesw I hang out with and we are all older wives with kids. Again..... WELCOME!!!! 

Welcome! My name is Kathy, from Tx and I understand how ur feeling, still trying to get adjusted myself... 

I know exactly how you feel this is our first duty station i have never been away from my family and now i am 3000 thousand miles away from them i am from ga. I also have worked since i was sixteen and i found out i was pregnant two weeks before we left and i am now a stay at home mom. We only have one car and hubby has it so i just sit home all day it killing me. I am also very shy probably one of the shyest person u will ever meet until i get to know u. Best of luck to u! 

I totally know how you feel! I'm almost 40 too, my kids are teens and all of my friends have PCS'd and my hubby is in another state right now. I had to come back here early last year, after we PCS'd for my job so I don't have any friends that live near post and it gets really lonely. It's so different as you become the older families in the Army. We don't have little, little ones so most people don't want anything to do with us because we can't do play dates for the kids. Since I work all week and I don't have ties to a unit here until my husband gets back up here in Nov I feel like I am out of options to make friends here. 

Aww shamwow, I love your name lol 

thanks :) I love that weird guy, especially his slap chop infommercial too. 

My father in law loves him lol. He's in jail now :/ lol 

Yea we figured with a line like:

Slap Chop, your going to love my nuts....

He was headed that way eventually lol 

Slap Chop, your going to love my nuts....

hahaha!! we used to laugh everytime that came one!!

im complete opposite i love to talk!! but i have not made any friends.. sometimes i freeze up and just shy away.. been here almost a year :( hailed all the way from OK but originally from NC 

Is this where the party has moved to, lol 

hahahaha noo way!! party over there!! Lol 

Oh and I love when he says " you got this camera guy"? Lol love it 

I think a lot of us are in the same position as you are im 3500 miles away from home stay at home mom with a 4 year old son and only have one vehicle and my husband has all the time for work. This is our first duty station as well and its a big change for us!! My poor son keeps telling me he wants to go home to his old house it gets depressing at times. Its starting a whole new life and i feel like im back in school again trying to make friends all over it sux. 

Girl,

Ive been here close to two years and I didnt make any friends until recently. I have one other friend here and thats about it. This has been our first duty station and before this he was reserve so we live very close to family. We moved here 3 weeks after our first daughter was born and I was miserable for a long time. he is a fire fighter so he was gone a whole lot and i would be at home with a new born baby all the time. I would be so scare if there was an emergency who would i reach for. I know how you feel and its hard. But hang in there!!!! now we are pcs'ing to Campbell and Im not looking forward to starting over!!! 

im over trying to make new friends here... pretty much if you dont live on post the other wives dont want nothing to do with you (IMO) ive put myself out there cooked for hung out on there time and everything i could.. back in OK i never did any thing to make friends until my neighbors told me i was a hermit and never came out....i go out with my daughter all the time to the park and R&R try to talk to other moms and they just snare up there noises... im over this place and over trying to make new friends 

ncmama09, I hear you loud and clear! We have been here for four years and I have made three really good friends, and that is because I am very picky who I let into my life, I have been burned to many times. 

its not that im picky its just really hard... and it sucks cuz i try to speak to everyone so my daughter can have someone to play with rather being stuck to my hip and my daughter is just really friendly i open up and there just like psh who is this.. why is she talking to me.. doesnt she know i came with someone else and dont feel talking with her 

Some people are stupid and I have gotten the same reaction, I just blow it off because I know it's their loss, I am such an awesome friend.. LOL!! 

yeah but here lately ive been getting the same reaction.. so it makes me feel like im doing something wrong ughhhh i never been so insecure about making friends in my life... i told my husband that im over it